Get Inside the Feelings Have you ever wanted to be with someone and you wanted so much for the relationship to work? And you keep going around and around in circles thinking about it. You think obsessively about the other person. Going over and over what they did, what they said. The worst part is if the other person breaks up with you. It’s one of the most horrid feelings imaginable. And we do everything possible not to feel it. But that’s what keeps us trapped in these painful, limiting and destructive patterns. There are different levels of our awareness. Many of us are stuck in our heads and that causes us to become disconnected from our feelings. Circular thinking is a means of disconnecting from our feelings, which cuts us off from the source of our power that makes change possible. Disconnecting from the source of our feelings leaves our head spinning in circles with fearful and anxious thoughts at the surface level of our consciousness. And that feeds the underlying anxiety, causing it to grow more powerful. It’s a self-destructive process that only digs the rut deeper and consequently we repeat the same patterns, creating even more pain in our lives. The example given above is only one of many. Most of us do this in one way or another. It took me some time to understand my own destructive thought patterns and tendencies to disconnect. And it’s easy to forget and fall back in the same pattern. It takes self-discipline and a concerted effort to become aware of the pattern and to connect with the underlying feelings that are at the source of the problem. I’ve learned to catch myself when I start to think in circles. It’s easy to fall into that pattern as I talk with friends giving them a play by play account of some personal drama, going over and over all the details and then trying to analyze what it all means. But now I intentionally stop the circular thought process as soon as I become aware of it. And then I ask myself …"What’s the feeling behind all of this?" Continually thinking over an issue disconnects us from the underlying source of our feelings which is another form of avoidance. We’re attempting to avoid the underlying pain by controlling the situation. But we cannot control what other people do or many of the situations we find ourselves in. Going right down into the middle of the feelings is one of the most powerful means of freeing yourself from limiting patterns. Sometimes the feelings are horrible. And you may feel like jumping out of your skin. Centering your awareness in the middle of the feelings while breathing softly and deeply brings consciousness into the wounded parts of yourself. Dysfunctional patterns wired into your body-mind can begin to break apart. You come to a place of acceptance for what you can not change. It becomes much easier to let go and move on. And the forces of creation can flow through you to create new opportunities and new resources will develop within you. And you will become much more present within your body and move through the world more powerfully.
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